Because I am

She’s pretty… for a black girl. She’s athletic… for a black girl. She even has good hair… for a black girl. And she’s even pretty smart… for a black girl.

 These are words that are said as if there is a color spectrum in our minds that decides whether or not someone is pretty enough or fit enough to be judged or compared to women as a whole. Instead their looks and talents are limited to someone of “their own kind.” Is judging and comparing ourselves to other people something that we should do? No. We should be focused on ourselves and how we can be the best version of ourselves, not how we can transform our bodies into those from People magazine.

 I know it is not just a problem in America. It is a worldwide trend that people have unknowingly adopted over the years. When people make these comments they don’t understand the true ignorance of their words or how those words truly affect the person they are talking to. As a young black, female born and raised in the South I have had to deal with several ignorant stereotypes placed on me based on my skin color. For example: “Is that your real hair?” “Do you know who your father is?” “Do you only listen to rap music?” “What is the hood like?” These are several questions I have had the pleasure of being asked as I have grown up. I laugh now, but it still hurts that people feel the need to judge and dissect my life because I may not be the same race as they are.

We breathe the same air. We bleed the same blood, but for some reason I am still not

perceived the same way. And I hate to admit this, but in the past I have let these people’s comments affect how I saw myself. Those were the moments that I was sitting in my bathroom, staring at the mirror that I realized just how much I allowed their ignorance to over-run my thoughts. Suddenly I was looking down on myself wondering why I couldn’t be as pretty as the white girls or as fit as the girls on People magazine. Suddenly the countless times my parents told me I was beautiful just the way I was wasn’t good enough. And that is when a thought came to my mind… If I let these people’s ignorant comments affect me in such a way that I begin to doubt myself, maybe it is time for me to change how I think. Maybe it is time for all of us to change how we think. When we finally allow ourselves to change and to adapt to the new lifestyle of being better people we will begin to think differently about ourselves. For example: “I am pretty, but because I say I’m pretty. I am athletic, but because I say I’m athletic. I even have good hair, but because I say I have good hair. And I’m even pretty smart, but because I say I’m smart.”

            Words are only words. We get to decide how we want to interpret them. If we stop focusing

on what everyone around us is thinking, we will start to see how we begin to grow into the people God intended for us to be. It’s about time for us to change the cycle of beating each other up and putting one another down. Instead we need to pick each other up and rise… rise as one race, the human race. And we can do it, but only if we eliminate these stereotypes. For those of you who have said things like this but say, “I am not prejudice,” …You really are.